Two same themed blogs in a row.

Got to love the Boxee box. For all of those that don't know what it is. It is the most awesome media player in the world. It will pull streaming video off line and play it on your TV. over 9000 movies and 1000 tv shows to choose from.

Well I was flicking through my list of favorites, and came across the new History Channel Series "Only in America". I thought I would check that out and see what it is all about. well the first thing on the list was "Pray the Gay Way". I thought that was weird, but I wanted to check it out. Turns out the Boxee box put it in the wrong category and I was really watching an O W N network show. I had seen the commercial for it a few days back and wanted to watch it.

They had many different types of people there. Ones that are self proclaimed X-Gay. They claimed by prayer and believing in god that they have become X-Gay. They also had people that were in the process of becoming x-gay. I really felt bad for this kid. He acted so repressed with his feelings. He did use to drag, drink, do drugs, and have random sex with guys, but now that He has found god, and is trying to become x-gay, he doesn't do that anymore. So I will admit that some good has come out of that mentality, as far as the crazy destructive life style is concerned. But you could tell that this kid was so bottled up.

But then they had a segment on this other group of kids. They had this summer camp where Gay kids can go to and learn about god and be in a place that was accepting of their sexuality.

It was a really good show, and Opera gets two thumbs up for airing it. All is said and done, one of the ministers of the group that wanted to change gays to straight came out and said "Weather your gay or straight you will be beside me in heaven as long as you believe in Jesus as our savior.

With that I am done talking tonight. I feel a little more at ease now that I watched the show and saw other gay peoples perspectives on being Christan.

Kris

Need to find me

Hi everyone, Well the two or three of you guys that read my blog.

Okay, I have said what I needed to say. The above text has been deleted, what I said was stuff I needed to say for the betterment of myself.

Now stuff that I want to say to everyone.

I am dealing with a lot of emotional things right now. Not sure where I fit in, Not sure where the future is going to take me, not sure of much right now. I feel as if I have been a drift on the sea of life for a while now, not really focused, just going where the current takes me. The problem is, I am stuck in an eddy. At times it looks like I am on the move, but wait a little while longer and I will be riding the current back to where I was. I need a sudden burst of wind to break me free of this eddy.

Wow, now I am getting really philosophical. Well hold on to your seats, its not over yet.

The other thing I am dealing with is God and Religion. Even though I always listen and love to listen to my Christan radio station. (WAY FM) little plug for them, they rock. I feel lost in my religion. I was brought up as a Presbyterian and still feel as if that is my denomination of choice. What I have a hard time with is, figure out where I fit in within a church setting. I really miss the fellowship of the church. I don't want to walk into a church "Hi its me aren't I fabulous", I don't think I need to disrupt things like that, but on the other hand I don't want keep myself closeted either. It is going to come out, I would rather people know from the start and get to know me for me, not for the guy that just came out. I know there are churches that present themselves as gay churches, but that is not what I really want. I don't want the focus on homosexuality, or even around it, but what I want is acceptance for the way I am, and given the right to worship the lord along side everyone else. After all we are all sinners in this world in one way or the other. (I know what I want to say in this space here, but I can't figure out how to put it into words right now. The rest of this thought is up to you guys.)

Well with all that being said, I will sign off.

Please post comments or thoughts about this posting.

Kris

P.S. I know there are a couple of my close family that read this blog, and are worried about me, please know that I will be okay. I just need to climb my way out of this valley, or blow my self out of this eddy. (anyone got a speed boat, that would help) I will be okay you guys.